A lot can change in a short amount of time, and usually it's only months down the road that I actually begin to notice the changes, LONG after the fact…so long that I'm onto new endeavors and projects and hobbies and relationships and it's all so busy
and rushed
and fast.
and I forget about my body
even though She carries me everywhere.
and I've gotten good at ignoring her
especially in the winter.
my mind tells her who's boss.
my delicate, human body~
She brings me back to equanimity.
I haven't given her enough space
I haven't given her time.
then I expect so much out of her.
some kind of five-star performance
pretty much every day.
and when she speaks up, I don't really listen.
She tells me she's sick, so I ignore her.
She tells me to slow down, so I keep doing.
She makes known how tired she is, and I criticize her for being too lazy.
I can't imagine consciously doing this to someone I love
but I must be
because I've been after myself for who knows how long.
I don't want to listen to her hungry heart
so I feed her full belly instead
so not to deny her hunger
yet starving her of voice.
I remind her she is safe.
Reminders don't usually work.
Only when I acknowledge her being,
the vastness of her beautiful humanness,
that I recall what feels safe.
When I can settle in again
I listen to her cries
and soothe her pain.
That's it.
Something cleared.
in true nourishment,
the taste of freedom.
~Katie
and rushed
and fast.
and I forget about my body
even though She carries me everywhere.
and I've gotten good at ignoring her
especially in the winter.
my mind tells her who's boss.
my delicate, human body~
She brings me back to equanimity.
I haven't given her enough space
I haven't given her time.
then I expect so much out of her.
some kind of five-star performance
pretty much every day.
and when she speaks up, I don't really listen.
She tells me she's sick, so I ignore her.
She tells me to slow down, so I keep doing.
She makes known how tired she is, and I criticize her for being too lazy.
I can't imagine consciously doing this to someone I love
but I must be
because I've been after myself for who knows how long.
I don't want to listen to her hungry heart
so I feed her full belly instead
so not to deny her hunger
yet starving her of voice.
I remind her she is safe.
Reminders don't usually work.
Only when I acknowledge her being,
the vastness of her beautiful humanness,
that I recall what feels safe.
When I can settle in again
I listen to her cries
and soothe her pain.
That's it.
Something cleared.
in true nourishment,
the taste of freedom.
~Katie